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Poisoned
It has been one month plus seen I left home. Time really flies. Sometimes, one will only treasure something more when he's going away. The question, do I miss home? Over here, I have been enjoying myself, having no pressure studying especially when all the modules taken are on S/U basis. Having English meals everyday is not really a problem as I am not that particular about food. Those interesting friends here have kept my days so busy with all sorts of their funny stuffs.
Back to the question, I do miss home but only to some extend. Probably that was because that I know I will be going back sooner or later. Singapore, my home. However there is someone who I admit that I miss a lot. Don't ask me who, I am not going to tell. If you think I am referring to you, just drop a comment. For all you may know, I am saying the same things to a lot of every other girl, which is what this girl feels.
The attractive points about her are actually all her bad points. A girl who just behave at her usual self, not afraid that people will see her bad points. To her, it is just like "You better known the flaws of the goods you are purchasing before you start to complain about it later on." Why didn't I go after her? Two excuses that I have thrown to myself are - "the timing's not right" and "I can't see a future with her" Why is the timing not right, you may ask. Well, when I got to know her a little bit better, I discovered that she already has someone else in her mind. Yes, I was busy iMAC-Cing at that time. Later, when everything ended – the MAC system crashed; the guy that she likes got attached with some other girl, I thought my chance has come. But, instead the second excuse came. I couldn't see a future... How am I going to start a relationship when I will be going overseas for six months of exchange soon, and may have another year of extension, which is not confirmed yet? Where will I be? Where will we be even if I manage to start that relationship?
Its only after being away that I realized I miss her so much. Listening to the song she sent me is so heartwarming. All the two previously mentioned excuses have become EXCUSES. They are nothing but craps. So what if there is already someone else in her mind, it is just my fault for being timid, having low self-confidence, not daring to take any action. Secondly, so what if I am going away. I can still chase her from across the globe. This is all only about doing FYP. Just that, I have to do two FYPs instead of one. One in Japan and one in Singapore. The FYP in Japan is of course my "Final Year Project", and the one in Singapore basically stands for "Find Your Partner". Instead of seeing the future, I should paint my own future this time. The most just shipped her over to Japan for me to chase. I am going to take her out on the 14th July, immediately after I touched down in Singapore!
Ideally, the above situation will be so wonderful. Recently, she seems so stressed up. I apologize for all my weird behaviors in MSN conversations and I don't expect anything from you. Just take it as a compliment. I will try to stop whatever of my nonsence. Good luck for mid-term.
Haha, to all my friends out there, if you like someone, go get him or her. Whatever theories, reasonings or excuses are just purely EXCUSES! What's the big deal, the most only kenna reject.
For those who are so curious of what the above are all about, I shall only drop one clue –
チョコレート好きな人がチョコレート嫌いな人に恋をしました。
I bet that girl also don't understand the above statement. Ask me lah, if you ask me, I will translate for you only if you are that girl I am referring to. Meanwhile, just fly kite bah.
25 more days to the states... Xinlin: prepare red carpet to welcome me!!
